[youtube_sc url=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBQxG0Z72qM”]

When you’ve settled into that unexpectedly happy place, mosey over to Soul Stops. Dolly’s interview with me on the subject of slowing down has spilled into a second post, and you can enjoy another chance to win a copy of Not So Fast. Yes, I’m giving away two copies of Not So Fast. (Congratulations to Alecia Simersky for winning the first copy!)

In part two, you’ll find out how we’ve handled technology with our kids. Have we always been this low tech?

Click through to find out.

The post Not So Fast at Soul Stops, Pt. 2 appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

Though I often crave caffeine, I can only tolerate it until noon, when I must stop drinking it or risk lying awake until two in the morning. Fortunately, I glanced at the clock on the stove: just after 10:00 a.m. I had time.

I spooned some caffeinated black tea into a paper loose tea filter, lowered it into the deep pottery mug, poured steaming water from the electric tea kettle over it and let it steep while I answered a few e-mails. A few minutes later, I returned to the kitchen and drizzled some honey into the mug and stirred. Breathing in the aroma, I knew this would keep me going for a few hours.

Both physical and virtual paperwork awaited, as well as phone calls and e-mails. Later in the day, an errand or two. The to-do’s of the day were flowing like the steady stream of a kitchen faucet—not as forceful as a fire hydrant nor as annoying as a drip, but I had to pay attention or the sink would fill and overflow, figuratively speaking.

So I kept at it, task after task, decision after decision, e-mail after e-mail, errand after errand. These things weren’t overwhelming; just steady. Somewhere in the afternoon, though, I needed a pause.

My cup, as it were, was empty.

I’d drained my literal cup of tea, and I had drained my figurative cup, my very self, of rest.

Life needs pauses.

I’d scheduled tire rotation and a medical test for my daughter, shopped for groceries and filled the gas tank; I printed off papers for my daughters’ schoolwork and agreed to bake brownies for a church function.

But…a pause. I needed a pause.

Late in the afternoon I returned to the kitchen and opened the cabinet to stare at my boxes of tea. I saw some chai tea. Decaf. By then it was past 3:00 p.m., so I could only handle decaf.

Filled the tea kettle.

Instead of racing around the corner to my desk, I leaned against the counter while the water boiled.

I waited.

Paused.

How easy it would be to check my phone for e-mail while the water boiled.

But, no. I paused.

And when the electric kettle bell dinged, I lifted the plastic kettle from its base and poured hot water over the tea bag, watching the bag rise with the waterline, all the way to the top, before it was soggy enough to sink. I took hold of the tag and dipped it down and up several times then let it settle at the bottom.

I briefly considered carrying my drink to the desk, but changed my mind. Instead, I walked to the table and sat for a moment, both hands hugging the mug to warm my palms.

Tea, I decided, is necessary.

Tea, I realized, is a slow-down solution.

Tendrils of steam drifted up from the glimmering dark surface of the tea and dissipated.

I lifted the mug and blew across the top, making ripples.

Then I tilted the mug and the tea touched my lips.

Slowly, I sipped.

_______________________________

Is every hour rush hour at your house?

Explore the jarring effects of our overcommitted culture and find refreshing alternatives for a more meaningful family and spiritual life.

Find a pace that frees your family to flourish.

“Not So Fast is a gift to every reader who takes the time to slow down and breathe in its pages.”

—Lee Strobel, best-selling author of The Case for Christ

:::

For the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome—though we love to try new dishes, your post doesn’t have to be a recipe. We’re pretty relaxed over here, and stories and photos are as welcome as menus and recipes.

The post Food on Fridays: Tea Is Necessary appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

My minivan awaits.

:::

This post is written in community with L.L. Barkat’s On, In, and Around Mondays writing project, Laura Boggess’s Playdates with God, and Michelle Derusha’s Hear It on Sunday, Use It on Monday.

The post A Sacred Pathway appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

One time we were making plans to have another family over for dinner. As we were discussing the get-together, they said, “So, after we eat at your house, what will we do? I suppose we’ll just sit around and … talk?”

“Um, yes. What would you do at someone else’s house?”

“Watch a movie or maybe a football game.”

“Oh, well, we just talk. I hope that’s okay. We’ll ask lots of questions if things drag a little!”

They came over and not only did they survive an evening without “entertainment” filling in the slower, quiet moments, but I think they actually had a good time.

I’ve thought a lot about their concern that we would just talk. They wondered what we would do and how we would fill all that time. We Americans are so used to noise and entertainment, this may be one of many challenges to building community and conversation in our culture.

The speed of our “microwave-fast culture” is also a major hurdle. Few of us take time to stop and sit down and talk, whether as a family or with friends. The culture itself works against this value, so we have to be intentional to make it happen.

This is so important and so hard.

Sometimes I take inspiration from my European relatives, who are located in Belgium and France. When we’re visiting, we’ve been part of multi-course meals that stretch out all evening.

And what do they do during each of those courses and in-between? How do they fill all that time?

They talk.

If you long to slow down, you can do the same.

Invite people over.

Share a meal.

Talk.

It’s a way to counter the culture without making a dramatic, disruptive, long-term change. Plus, you’ll have a chance to build community while you’re slowing down!

Try to schedule a dinner in the next few weeks with some friends.

Don’t schedule it around a football game (I know that’s almost impossible this time of year, but try).

Don’t rent a movie as a backup plan.

Just plan a meal (it doesn’t have to be a multi-course affair; in fact, Americans don’t seem to mind a pitch-in).

And then?

For one night, reclaim conversation.

Does the thought of sustaining that much conversation intimidate you like it did my friends? Here are some slow-down solutions to help you enjoy connection and reclaim conversation:

• Ask curious, open-ended questions. Decide how in-depth this group of people will want to go. If this is a group of friends from church intending to dig deeper into each other’s lives, you can ask different questions than you would with a group of neighbors who are just getting acquainted. Either way, however, open-ended questions are the way to get people responding with more than one sentence or one word.
• Listen. Our culture is influenced by creative media presentations on TV and film that overlap images, sound and text; plus, almost everyone is accustomed to multi-tasking and dividing attention, half-listening to a conversation while texting someone else, for example. This encourages and supports interruption, which stifles and shuts down meaningful conversation. Fight the urge to overlap or interrupt. Try to focus completely on the speaker and listen carefully and actively to what he or she is saying. Even repeat back part of what was said to be sure you understood completely.
• Ask follow-up questions. Sometimes people will cut themselves off for fear of dominating the conversation. If everyone seems to be enjoying the direction of a person’s story or response, ask a follow-up question to bring them out a little more.
• Encourage stories. When people tell their stories, we get to know them better. Plus, one story may spark a memory in someone else, leading to more stories.
• Use pre-fab questions. Check out Garry D. Poole’s The Complete Book of Questions: 1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion (you should be able to sample 99 “Light and Easy” questions from the book at this link). Though it might seem a little contrived to pull out a book of pre-printed questions, this simple tool can get people laughing and sharing right away, should things drag a little. Pinpoint five to ten questions ahead of time that may fit the group that’s gathered around your table (or living room, if the meal is finished and you’ve migrated to couches with coffee and dessert). There are other books of questions available, but Garry’s is organized so that the questions go deeper and deeper as the numbers go higher, moving toward more spiritually focused topics.
• Be vulnerable. Without overwhelming or over-sharing, be willing to offer something a little vulnerable to take a conversation deeper than small talk. The appropriate depth depends upon the group and the goal of the evening. You can lead the way without hogging the conversation by modeling a vulnerable response.
• Relax and have fun! Regardless of the flow of conversation or topics explored, one key to reclaiming conversation is to be relaxed and enjoy yourself. If the host is uptight, the conversation might be stilted and awkward, as guests might be concerned about doing something upsetting. Lead the way with a smile, mood and tone that encourage a comfortable atmosphere.

I invite you to report back on your gathering with observations, recommendations, and lessons learned.

Photo of European young people, copyright 2005 by Ann Kroeker. This post contains affiliate links.

_____________________________________

Is every hour rush hour at your house?

Explore the jarring effects of our overcommitted culture and find refreshing alternatives for a more meaningful family and spiritual life.

Find a pace that frees your family to flourish.

“Not So Fast is a gift to every reader who takes the time to slow down and breathe in its pages.”

—Lee Strobel, best-selling author of The Case for Christ

The post Reclaim Family Conversation at Mealtime appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

Tell me, what is it you plan to doWith your one wild and precious life?(Mary Oliver, from “The Summer Day“)

[L]et me know how fleeting is my life…Each man’s life is but a breath.(Psalm 39: 4b, 5)

There’s always more to come: subscribe to Ann Kroeker by e-mail

Want to slow down in our fast-paced world? Check out Not So Fast.

“Like” me on Facebook.

Follow me on Twitter.

The post Tell me, what is it you plan to do? appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

(smaller button below)

For the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome—though we love to try new dishes, your post doesn’t have to be a recipe. We’re pretty relaxed over here, and stories and photos are as welcome as menus and recipes.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (sorry for the delay on the promised button battle…more later on that) to paste at the top of your post. It ties us together visually.Then fill in the boxes of this linky tool to join the fun!

Food on Fridays with Ann

When the kids were little, I’d been a sale-seeking, coupon-clipping mama, rooting out the cheapest peanut butter and oatmeal in town. I turned to the Frugal Zealot, Amy Dacyczyn, author of The Tightwad Gazette, for ideas and instruction on how to live frugally.After a few years our budget wasn’t quite so tight, so we loosened up a little. But the squeeze everyone is feeling these days is squeezing us, as well, and so we’re cutting back in several areas, including groceries.I don’t know if I’ll renew that intensely zealous approach right away, but we happily ate a meat-free meal yesterday (it’s healthy and saves money), and I found pork chops and chicken on sale at Kroger.I haven’t made pork chops in ages, but there they were, offered at a ridiculously low price. So I bought them.An Internet search for “pork chop recipe” turned up several interesting prospects, which I cut-and-pasted into Evernote until I decided which one to try.After consulting with the kids, I settled on a slow cooker recipe, but I’ll tell you what—my pictures don’t look as dreamy as the Taste of Home glamor shot. Mine show you the results of an average cook trying something for the first time.The recipe says you have to coat each pork chop in a flour mixture, then brown each side before placing in the crock pot.The first were fine, but as I progressed, I went from “browning” the chops to almost “blackening” the chops, at least in spots.But they worked out fine. I layered them and then poured a flour-broth mixture over them that would create a sauce or gravy as they cooked the rest of the way through in the crock pot.They cooked a long time, longer than expected, but turned out really lovely, forming a sauce that we ladled over brown rice.A lettuce salad served with the meal included a hearty helping of homegrown tomatoes from the garden topped with a homemade dressing.A simple, tasty, affordable meal.Here’s the recipe, which I doubled:Slow Cooker Pork Chops(source: Taste of Home)Ingredients

• 3/4 cup all-purpose flour, divided
• 1/2 teaspoon ground mustard
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic pepper blend
• 1/4 teaspoon seasoned salt
• 4 boneless pork loin chops (1/2 inch thick and 4 ounces each)
• 2 tablespoons canola oil
• 1 can (14-1/2 ounces) chicken broth

Directions

• In a large resealable plastic bag, combine 1/2 cup flour, mustard, pepper blend and seasoned salt. Add chops, one at a time, and shake to coat. In a large skillet, brown meat in oil on each side.
• Transfer to a 5-qt. slow cooker. Place remaining flour in a small bowl; whisk in broth until smooth. Pour over chops. Cover and cook on low for 3 to 3-1/2 hours or until meat is tender.
• Remove pork to a serving plate and keep warm. Whisk pan juices until smooth; serve with pork. Yield: 4 servings.

:::

Photos by Ann Kroeker.

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Want to slow down in our fast-paced world? Check out Not So Fast.

“Like” me on Facebook.

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The post Food on Fridays: Slow Cooker Pork Chops appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

On Four Things that Bring PeaceCHRIST. My son, I will now teach you the way of peace and true freedom.THE DISCIPLE. Lord, instruct me, I pray. I am eager to learn.CHRIST. My son, resolve to do the will of others rather than your own. (Matt.26:39)Always choose to possess less rather than more. (Matt.10:10)Always take the lowest place, and regard yourself as less than others. (Luke 14:10)Desire and pray always that God’s will may be perfectly fulfilled in you. (Matt. 6:10)A man who observes these rules shall come to enjoy peace and tranquillity of soul.THE DISCIPLE. Lord, in these few words of Yours lie the whole secret of perfection. If I could only faithfully observe them, no trouble could distress me. For whenever I am anxious- and weary, I find that it is because I have strayed from Your teaching. All things are in Your power, and You always long to bring souls to perfection. Give me your grace ever more richly; help me to keep Your word and advance my salvation.(From The Imitation of Christ, by Thomas à Kempis; my emphasis of words in bold)

:::

Back from vacation, where everything our family of six needed fit comfortably into a minivan and pop-up trailer, I begin to study my belongings. What can I eliminate?

Browsing my bookshelves, I pluck a title and consider. Keep? Sell? Give away?

I toss it into the give away box.

One thin volume from a vast collection, but it’s one less thing. One less possession.

Always choose to possess less rather than more, wrote à Kempis. It’s one way, he claims, to enjoy peace and tranquility of soul.

I live in a land of acquisition, and those who acquire must store, protect, maintain, and repair the things acquired. When I survey all that I’ve acquired, I realize that it’s nothing but stuff. Stuff. And this stuff does not lead to peace and tranquility. Rather, it demands my time and attention: I’m frequently thinking about it, researching it, arranging my space to accommodate it.

I don’t want a life revolving around stuff.

My friend and I passed through the garage one afternoon as we headed to the pool.

“Behold, our junk,” I said, a hint of disgust punctuating the word “junk” as I waved my hand toward the stacks of boxes, piles of drain pipes, and haphazard collection of toys, bikes, rakes, garden tools and paint cans.

“Wow,” she marveled, “it amazes me how we can end up with so much stuff.”

So. Much. Stuff.

To be burdened by too much stuff. A first-world problem, for sure.

Embarrassing. Humiliating. Exhausting.

To enjoy peace and tranquility of soul, possess less.

I’m slowly letting go, emptying, possessing less.

How strange that I am looking forward to this tangible result to mark progress: the luxury of an empty shelf.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth,where moth and rest destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.”(Matthew 6:19)

There’s always more to come: subscribe to Ann Kroeker by e-mail

Want to slow down in our fast-paced world? Check out Not So Fast.

“Like” me on Facebook.

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The post Possess Less appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

(smaller button below)

For the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome—though we love to try new dishes, your post doesn’t have to be a recipe. We’re pretty relaxed over here, and stories and photos are as welcome as menus and recipes.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (My daughter doesn’t quite have the new one ready, and now a second daughter wants to battle it out by offering her own version! Until they’re ready, grab the big one above or smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post. It ties us together visually.Then fill in the boxes of this linky tool to join the fun!

Food on Fridays with Ann

When we vacation, we usually camp. And we like almost everything about camping except the cooking and clean-up.I would sigh to my friends after a trip and say, “My dream is to find a beautiful place we can camp, where I don’t have to cook. That would be perfect.”One day about eight years ago, I said this to a friend, and she said, “Seems like you need a family camp.””I’ve thought about that,” I said, “but I don’t want to pay a huge amount of money, and I don’t want a lot of activities and programming. It seems like most of them are highly programmed and costly.””Do you know Katie Henderson?*” she asked. We all attended the same large church, but I’d never overlapped with Katie. “Well,” my friend continued, “she and her family go to some family camp up north every year, and it sounds like it might be just what you’re looking for.”I phoned Katie and explained about the beautiful setting and the food hassle and the preference for little to no programming. “If someone else was making, serving and cleaning up after meals,” I said, “I’d feel like I was really on a vacation.”“This is your place,” Katie assured me. She said the food was good, the setting was gorgeous, and there was very little programming. “There’s no speaker or music or chapel. Just a service on Sunday morning, and an optional Bible study two days of the week. Actually, there’s so little programming, we call it ‘Heathen Week,'” she said, laughing.”Perfect!” I said.So our family took the risk. We signed up, paid what seemed to be a reasonable amount of money for the week, and drove north. But it was a long drive and we didn’t have Google maps back then, so we underestimated how long it would take to get there. We rolled in late, just as the opening activity—Saturday evening dinner—was ending, but we’d phoned to say we were running late and they saved food for us. I was stressed out, and when they brought us a high chair for our youngest and set out the food that they’d reheated, it had to be the most delicious, nourishing chicken dinner I’d ever eaten in my life. If we’d rolled into a campground and had to fix our own meal, I would have done it with cranky, needy kids tugging on me. And I would have done it all in the dark. Thinking back to being served with such compassion and attention, I’m sure I cried: from relief.We slid the pop-up between slender cedar trees and went to sleep that night hearing the water of Lake Huron lap against the shore. Next morning, we woke up to dim dawn light revealing colorful kayaks lined up along the sand; shore birds laughing; a green boat anchored and bobbing in the water; the gray-green lodge and dining hall; Adirondack chairs lined up on a porch overlooking the bay.So this is vacation.I didn’t have to think about breakfast. I just had to listen for the bell to ring, mosey to the lodge, and there it would be: a delicious, warm meal that I didn’t have to plan, shop for, prepare or clean up after.Relax, play, rest, read, swim, boat, chat…listen for the meal bell…show up and be fed.Perfect.I thought I would use this post as an excuse to show you a few photos from the trip that have something to do with food…food I didn’t fix.This isn’t at family camp, but Biggby Coffee is a chain we’d never heard of that is big in Michigan. We stopped en route to try some. Two of the girls got lattes and loved them.Quiche for breakfast one morning at family camp—one of many options. The cook accommodates dietary needs, providing options on the buffet for vegetarian campers or those who deal with allergies and food intolerance.A favorite hot breakfast of mine: Red River Cereal, made with three grains: cracked wheat, cracked rye, and whole flax. So simple. Some tease that it’s birdseed, but I love it.Two afternoons they set out food for us in the morning so that we pack lunches for later that day. Some people drive to local tourist spots, but we just stayed on property, hiked out to this beautiful spot, climbed a big rock, and ate lunch together overlooking Lake Huron.S’mores fixin’s provided on the last night during campfire.Cocoa, teas, coffee, and cold drinks like fruit punch and lemonade are available 24 hours a day. Kids and adults alike grab mugs, serve themselves something refreshing, and sit on the porch to read.I didn’t really think to take a lot of photos of food—I was too busy eating it, I guess.

We left family camp and stopped by a couple of other places in Canada, including Niagara Falls, before winding around into New York and Pennsylvania, sliding along the edge of Lake Erie.

The Belgian Wonder exited the freeway and drove on a scenic road that offered tantalizing glimpses of the water. We longed to drive close and dip our feet into the water, but he’d turn onto a road that looked promising only to discover it was a private drive.Finally, we found a little public park where we could stop, get out, stretch our legs, and eat our peanut butter sandwiches and carrot sticks packed from our own meager provisions. The tiny concession area sold only pop and chips, but I was so grateful that they were maintaining this pretty little place where we could pause, I broke down and bought a Coke and a Sprite as a small thank you.We lingered for a while.Then realized we had to get on the road.We munched on snack food on the long drive home.We’d been gone for nine days, camping in a beautiful setting, and the only thing I had to fix was a stack of peanut butter sandwiches for lunch, and instant oatmeal that we ate with plastic spoons from paper bowls on the morning we drove home.I can handle that.

:::

* Name changedAll photos by Ann Kroeker except Lunch on the Rock, by P. Kroeker.

There’s always more to come: subscribe to Ann Kroeker by e-mail

Want to slow down in our fast-paced world? Check out Not So Fast.

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The post Food on Fridays: Vacation Food appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

Today, I swept my hair back. My forehead was bare.

At breakfast I told the kids I would be attending an Ash Wednesday service at a church near ours. The service was at noon, I said, so I would leave around 11:40 to get there. I assured them that it was not a biblical mandate to get the ashes and since our church doesn’t follow the custom, I saw no reason why they should feel obligated to attend; however, I would be delighted to have them join me. Did anyone want to go with me?

They turned me down. Well, one of the girls considered it, but ended up getting a babysitting gig. So I went to my first-ever Ash Wednesday service alone, worshiping with Lutherans at the church building directly across the street from ours.

In spite of my slow-down fast, I got a late start and parked far from the door. I ran through the light rain without bothering to open my umbrella. Apparently Lutherans start right on time, because by the time I was slipping into the sanctuary a mere three minutes late, they had already finished the opening remarks and pastor’s welcome, and were on the last lines of a hymn. I slid into a pew, set my purse down, and wiped beads of moisture from my forehead.

We followed a program with responsive readings, Scripture readings, hymns, and a children’s message about “I” being right in the middle of “prIde” and “sIn.” We heard a short sermon for adults, recited the Nicene Creed, prayed, confessed—kneeling—and said the Lord’s Prayer.

The ancient custom of applying ashes, they said, reminds us of the wages of sin; that we are dust and to dust we will return. The ashes remind us that our sins need to be removed by the grace of God in Christ Jesus.

We took communion first. Filing up, row by row, we were given the wafer, took a small cup of wine, and then presented our forehead or hand to the pastor for the “imposition of ashes.”

I presented my forehead; that is, I stood there in front of the pastor, my forehead wiped dry from the rain and swept clear of hair, a blank canvas for him to do his work of “imposition.”

As he smeared the ashes in the form of a cross, he said, “though you are dust, Jesus died for you.”

I walked back to my pew, glancing at others in the room bearing their crosses. This was a first for me, to see a room full of people living with the ashen cross on their person in this way, remembering their frailty, their sin, dust on dust.

The fidgety little boy in the row in front of me quieted when he noticed the mark on his mother’s forehead. He pointed, then leaned forward and poked it, smearing the mark. Who can blame him? It’s impossible to ignore.

When the service was over, I walked out the door and popped up the umbrella. I didn’t want the ashes to wash off yet. I wanted to live with them a while longer.

As it happens, I have worn my ashes all day and watched the kids glance up at the mark and smile. Though they missed the service, they can’t miss the symbol, the reminder, the cross.

Though I am dust, Jesus died for me.

Because I am dust, Jesus died for me.

Amen.

:::

My TheHighCalling.org friend and colleague Glynn Young wrote about Ash Wednesday, as well, at his blog Faith, Fiction, Friends. He wrote a poem, which begins:

I always envied my friends

who came to schoolthe day after Mardi Gras

with a smudged forehead,

a spot of ash or soot

index-fingered

upon skin to signify

what – exactly?

Read the rest at “Ash Wednesday.“

“On Ash Wednesday, we stare death in the face,” says Mark D. Roberts, Senior Director of Laity Lodge and Theologian in Residence. Mark explains the Ash Wednesday tradition in depth at his post, “Ash Wednesday: Practice and Meaning” and offers a shorter reflection in his daily devotional today: “Remembering the Compassion of God on Ash Wednesday.”

Also, I’m embarking on a slow-down fast (see button above) that includes a multitask fast, something I originally heard about from Charity Singleton last year. Others are embarking on a similar “fast” this year, including Michelle DeRusha of Graceful. I will be posting specifically about my slow-down fast experiences on Saturdays (and provide a linky for those who wish to link Lent-related posts).

Visit Cassandra Frear of Moonboat Cafe for a roundup of Lenten Fast posts.

All of these people—Glynn, Mark, Michelle, Cassandra and Charity—are part of TheHighCalling.org (THC), and so I offer these links as part of Charity’s THC community-building project, “There & Back Again.”

Each Thursday, consider going “There and Back Again” yourself. It’s simple.

Here are Charity’s steps:

1. Choose another High Calling Blogger to visit. It can be someone you have “met” before, or do what I do, and work your way through the “Member Posts” section of thehighcalling.com to meet someone new.
2. Visit his blog, digesting the message until it becomes something that you can write about.
3. Go back to your blog and write about it, being sure to link to the post that gave you the idea so that your readers can visit, too.
4. Add the button to your blog so your readers know you are participating in “There and Back Again.”
5. Go back to the Network blog and leave a comment so your new friend can feel the link love!
6. Complete the journey by returning here, to Wide Open Spaces, and enter your link so that we all can benefit from the new High Calling connection you have made.

Credit: Image of Ann Kroeker’s Ash Wednesday forehead taken by Sophie Kroeker and edited by Ann Kroeker. Used with permission.

The post There & Back Again: My First Ash Wednesday appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

Join me as I embark on a “Slow-Down Fast”: a season dedicated to humbly and boldly simplifying and slowing (schedule, habits, activities, thought-patterns) in order to experience a more focused and intimate relationship with God in my everyday life.The “fast” will begin Ash Wednesday, March 9, and end on Easter Sunday.I’ll be preparing and planning for the next two weeks, publishing Slow-Down Fast posts on Saturdays in conjunction with Cheryl’s Simplify theme. To participate in Cheryl’s Simplify “carnival,” pop over to Culture Smith after writing and publishing something about simplifying your life. She’s got a linky up already for today.You can also link up ideas for your own “Slow-Down Fast” here:

Ann’s Slow-Down Fast Thoughts & Plans:

In my book Not So Fast, I talk about capacity. Like it or not, each of us has a limited capacity of tasks we can accomplish and activities we can attend—when we exceed capacity, especially on an ongoing basis, we enter a kind of survival mode as we deal with consequences like emotional drain, stress symptoms, relational strain, fatigue, and discouragement.To think of it in the positive, however, each of us has an ideal capacity and speed, and if we can discover that, we can enjoy healthy, productive lives that allow for rest and worship as well as work—not to mention time with family and friends. When we’re operating at ideal capacity, minor mishaps can be dealt with more creatively because we aren’t rushing off to the next thing and can adjust our schedule to clean up the mess or wait longer for an appointment.Discovering my ideal capacity is an evolving thing. Just when I find what works, my kids enter a new stage of life and my capacity shifts—it may open up with more possibilities than ever before, or it may shrink when the kids need much more from me than I expected.Lately, my kids have seemed to require less moment-by-moment attention and input. Because they need less hovering attention, I’ve had more free time and emotional space (or so I thought); thus, I’ve experimented with my schedule, agreeing to take on tasks and projects I couldn’t have pulled off two years before. I thought I had adequate capacity, so I experimented.In the past, these experiments have often worked well. Lately, however, they haven’t.In the past three weeks, I’ve realized that I’ve taken on too much; I’m operating at maximum capacity—probably a smidgen over capacity. I’m less patient, discerning and attentive. I feel drained. I even missed an appointment on Monday, and though it turned out okay in the end, I spent most of the day scolding myself and feeling like a failure. I knew it was because I had too much going on.I’m living over capacity and exceeding my limits.And I can’t continue like that.What can change? Here’s the start of my Slow-Down Fast “To-Do/Not-To-Do” list:

• During my slow-down fast, Lord willing (which can be assumed with each of these points), I won’t launch any new projects or take on new tasks. If people ask for my help, I’ll ask if it can wait until after Easter.
• Unless we’re faced with imminent issues in that time frame, I will avoid making major decisions.
• When I reach closure on a project or commitment, I won’t fill that open time slot with something new.
• I’ll try to do something fun every day.
• I’ll try to do something relaxing every day.
• I’ll listen to music. I’m not as auditory as some folks, maybe, but for some reason I have neglected this. Of course, I do have young musicians pounding away on the piano two feet away from my desk, so maybe they’ve become my default soundtrack…along with the quiet that follows when they’re finished?
• While I may not post all of my list publicly, I will continue counting “One Thousand Gifts” with Ann Voskamp, picking up where I left off long ago.
• I intend to maintain good habits I have in place (reading, journaling, praying).

How do you hope to slow down and simplify during Lent (or any time)?

Credits: Photo of reading in hammock by Ann Kroeker, taken on a late summer day in 2009. Slow-Down Fast button created from a photo by kacos2000/Costas, used under a Creative Commons license permitting the image to be shared and adapted for non-commercial purposes.

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I’m inviting you to join me as I embark on a “Slow-Down Fast”: a season dedicated to humbly and boldly simplifying and slowing (schedule, habits, activities, thought-patterns) in order to experience a more focused and intimate relationship with God in my everyday life.The “fast” will begin Ash Wednesday, March 9, and end on Easter Sunday.I’ll be preparing and planning for the next two weeks, publishing Slow-Down Fast posts on Saturdays in conjunction with Cheryl’s Simplify theme. To participate in Cheryl’s Simplify “carnival,” pop over to Culture Smith after writing and publishing something about simplifying your life. She’s got a linky up already for today.You can also link up ideas for your own “Slow-Down Fast” here:

Ann’s Personal Slow Notes:

I fill the tea kettle. Dishwasher sloshes, dryer whirrs, both machines working in the background as I sit to think, to write, to pray.It hits me: How rare to be alone.As a part-time freelance writer and editor, I work from home. I’m also, however, a home educator; thus, many hours are devoted to planning and guiding my children’s academic requirements; holding them accountable to assignments; helping them manage their time; listening to them practice piano, flute or saxophone; preparing breakfast, lunch and dinner; holding them to their chores and inspecting their work.Though this lifestyle may sound complicated, most of the time it is relatively simple.But it is a peopled life. As I said, I’m rarely alone in the house.On most days, I manage to carve out a few minutes for myself, slipping away to a quiet spot in the context of a full house. Some mornings I exercise in the basement on a stair-climbing machine; I try to read, pray and journal at the table before the kids come down for breakfast.But sometimes I just want the whole house to myself.Sometimes I want to sit at my desk—which is situated in the middle of a high-traffic area because we have no extra rooms for an office—and know that I’m not going to be interrupted. I’d like to finish composing a blog post or retreat message without the pounding of piano keys working out a tough solo a mere two-and-a-half feet from where I sit.I flourish in the simplicity of silence and solitude.Though this is no sacrifice on my part, I’m going to ask my husband if he can help me find a way to have regular time alone in the house during my slow-down fast.And I’m going to bask in it now.How will you slow down or simplify?

The post Slow-Down Fast & Simplify: Silence & Solitude appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

I’m sending you to Cheryl and inviting you back here again thanks to inspiration from Charity at Wide Open Spaces, home of There & Back Again.

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(I make my own buttons. Can you tell? Smaller version and html code available below)

It’s back and bigger than ever:

Mega Memory Month 2011!

As we launch the new year, we’re also launching Mega Memory Month 2011.Mega Memory Month (MMM) began back in 2008, when I invited people to join me in a month-long memorization extravaganza. Over the years I’ve hosted MMM during the months of January, June and October; but I’ve concluded that the best time to undertake a mega memory project is in January, when resolve is high and few holidays distract us from our goals.So here we are: January 2011 is just days away.What would you like to hide in your heart?Take the next few days to pray, plan and prepare. Then launch your memory project on Saturday, January 1, 2011 (detailed instructions below).

I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing…If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples. (John 15:5, 7-8, emphasis mine)

Mega Memory Month Participants:

Here’s how to participate:

1. Pick something you’d like to memorize. Something long. Something formidable. Something Mega. (Mega to you may not be mega to me–simply challenge yourself relative to what you’ve tackled in the past.) You could select a passage of Scripture, a poem, a classic hymn and/or a famous speech. It’s up to you.
2. Announce it on your blog whenever you like.
3. Return to this post to link up, talking about how you’re going to take the challenge and participate in the Mega Memory Month carnival. Facebook users can interact at the MMM 2011 FB headquarters.
4. Mega Memory Month Progress Reports. On Mondays (because it offers the best alliteration), I’ll write a Mega Memory Month Progress Report. Chime in with your own progress report that day (or any time during the week) in the comments or link to your own MMM Progress Report post. That way we can visit and encourage each other.
5. Share memory techniques you’re using, so we can borrow ideas that work. Click here for a list of memorization tips and techniques I’ve collected and here for a great resource someone else has compiled.
6. Final Celebration! By the end of the month, present a creative culmination of your work (ideas: a video of you–and your family, if they’re participating–reciting it by heart; write it out by hand and take a photo; type it up on the blog).

Join me?

Don’t want to post a brain coral button on your blog? Here’s an alternative:

And…a little one with the “splat” motif.

Large Brain Coral button html code:<p style=”text-align: center;”><a href=”https://annkroeker.com/” target=”_blank”><img title=”MMM2010″ src=”https://annkroeker.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/MMM2010-300×214.jpg” alt=”” width=”300″ height=”214″ /></a></p>Small Brain Coral button html code:<p style=”text-align: center;”><strong><strong> <a href=”https://annkroeker.com/”><img title=”MMM2010small” src=”https://annkroeker.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/MMM2010small.jpg” alt=”” width=”200″ height=”166″ /></a></strong></strong></p>Large Splat button html code:<p style=”text-align: center;”><strong><strong><a href=”https://annkroeker.com/”><img title=”mmmsplat2″ src=”https://annkroeker.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/mmmsplat2-300×214.jpg” alt=”” width=”300″ height=”214″ /></a></strong></strong></p>Small Splat button html code:<p style=”text-align: center;”><a href=”https://annkroeker.com/”><img title=”mmmsplat2011small” src=”https://annkroeker.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/mmmsplat2011small.jpg” alt=”” width=”200″ height=”143″ /></a></p>

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Yesterday at High Calling Blogs, Michelle of Graceful posted a story about how she was caught fake-listening to her son.

• How often do I tune in or out?
• How guilty am I of fake-listening?
• What are my canned responses “interjected at appropriate moments to maintain the illusion of conversation”?

How often do I tune in or out?This is tricky, because as a work-from-home writer and editor, I don’t keep regular office hours. Worse, my desk is situated in a large shared room with the piano and comfiest couch, so someone is often in the room while I’m tapping away. The result of this arrangement? To get anything done I have to tune out! When I need to work uninterrupted for a chunk of time, I alert the family and they have respected my need to focus.Other times, when I’m doing light editing or answering e-mails, the kids come and go with various requests. Sometimes I’m in the midst of composing an e-mail (or blog post!) and need a few minutes to finish a thought. In those cases, I ask for five minutes to finish so that I can give them my full attention. When they have something to say and I’m able to break away, I do try to swivel away from my laptop in order to look them straight in the eyes.How guilty am I of fake-listening?I grew up with a family member who told and repeated long stories. The stories dragged on and on; as a result, I developed pretty impressive fake-listening skills. I could be generating a storyline in my head and still give the illusion of listening. When I was in top form, this person seemed to believe I was completely engaged, though perhaps the speaker was also pretending—pretending I was listening to the story in order to have an excuse to continue talking. That’s possible. We humans are pretty desperate to be heard. I’m not proud of my fake-listening skills and do not want to be practicing them with my husband and kids.But I have moments. Two of my four kids in particular love to have an ear and can go on and on. I’ve had to snap to attention and get my brain lined up with their stream of words. At the same time, I’m trying to teach one of them to summarize and pick up on clues from others, especially adults, who are trying to break away–important “emotional intelligence” skills to develop in order to relate well to people. What are my canned responses “interjected at appropriate moments to maintain the illusion of conversation”?I share “Really?” “Wow!” and “Hmmmm” with Michelle as three top responses. Maybe even “That’s interesting.”But my top response is “Oh.”I like its versatility. It can be expressed with a hint of surprise: “Oh!”Or it can invite the speaker to elaborate: “Oh?” Sometimes it’s a way to communicate that I get a person’s joke or learned something new: “Ohhhhhh” (a grin and knowing nod accompany this one). In this use, the “Ohhhhhh” occasionally morphs into an “Ahhhhhh.”This handy word (or is it just a sound?) can also acknowledge that I heard them and there’s not much more to say in response other than a simple and earnest, “Oh” (or “Ah”); as in “Oh, I see” or “Ah, yes.”I’ve even noticed one of my kids picking up on this use of “Ah” as a means of acknowledging that he heard and processed my response. For example, today my youngest asked, “What does ‘promote’ mean, Mom?”“We could look it up,” I said, “but it means to cause someone to kind of move up to a better job or position. A boss can promote someone at work.”“Ah.”I admit that my use of “oh” can be a way to fake-listen. But it can also be a legitimate response after truly hearing what my child (or anyone) is saying.Yesterday afternoon I was feeling extremely tired, so I headed up to my bed to lie down for a few minutes. I was planning to let my mind wander a little in the quiet of my room.“Mom?” my son called out to me. “Mom? Where are you?”Sigh.“I’m upstairs.”He bounded up the stairs and stood in the bedroom doorway. “Can I come in?”“Sure.”He slipped to the side of the bed. “Are you okay?” he asked.“I’m fine. I just came upstairs to lie down for a few minutes. You can join me, if you like.” I folded back the covers and scooted over. He climbed in and lay there staring at the ceiling for a minute.“Percy Jackson had to defeat a Hydra in some building in Nashville, Tennessee,” he began, reviewing some key scenes from the movie Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief. “And then he went to some garden where he defeated Medusa.”I was relaxed and reflective, but I was listening. “Hmmmm,” I murmured.“I think it was in Michigan,” he continued, “but I’m not sure.”“That’s interesting,” I replied.“But his mom got out of Hades and he got the lightning bolt back to Zeus.”“Really?”“Yes, and then it ended with him practicing fighting with Athena’s daughter.”“Ohhhhh,” I replied. “That sounds nice. Did he get to meet his dad?”“His dad? Poseidon? Yes, he did.”“Ah.”Same words as my canned responses, but these weren’t canned. I was listening. And in spite of how hot it was that afternoon, I let my son snuggle close and kissed him on the cheek.“listen to me…” photo by Michela Mongardi. Available under a Creative Commons license through Flickr.com.

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(smaller button below)

Here at the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome—though we love to try new dishes, your post doesn’t have to be a recipe. If you want to research plantains or papayas, that’s great. Posts like that are as welcome as menus and recipes.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (the big one above or smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post and join us through Mr. Linky.Here’s a Mr. Linky tutorial:

Write up a post, publish, then return here and click on Mr. Linky below. A screen will pop up where you can type in your blog name and paste in the url to your own Food on Fridays post (give us the exact link to your Food on Fridays page, not just the link to your blog).You can also visit other people’s posts by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking participants’ names–you should be taken straight to their posts.Please note: I’ll do my best to update this post by hand. In the meantime, please click on the Mister Linky logo to view the complete list.

Food on Fridays Participants

Food on Fridays with AnnWhen we planted our garden, we put in three zucchini plants.“I can’t wait to eat zucchini bread!” my son exclaimed. “I looooooove zucchini bread.”That was back in May. When we would go out to weed or water the garden, he’d ask if the zucchini was ready.“Not yet,” I’d reply.“Awwww….I was hoping we could make zucchini bread.”“We have to wait until we get a bunch of them,” I said, “or a couple of big ones.”I sent out my son with peelings and egg shells for the compost. “Do we have any zucchini?” I asked.“Nope,” he replied. “I looked. Not yet.”The other day I was invited to Charity’s house for tea. But she didn’t serve just tea. She made brownies, as well.Zucchini brownies!They were fantastic! I eagerly and shamelessly accepting a second piece when she offered!I told her that my son often asked if the zucchini was ready, but we got our garden in late and so…no zucchini. In fact, I told her I’d seen blooms but no fruit, so I wondered if they needed pollination. She described how she successfully pollinated hers the year before. I thought about enlisting the help of my science-minded daughter for that task.“For now, I have more than enough to share,” Charity said, “so I’ll send some home with you and you can make zucchini bread with your son.”What a fantastic offer: I’d be bringing home zucchini for my little boy.After the brownies, we got involved in discussions about blogging and art. We forgot all about the zucchini. I left without it.Fortunately we saw each other a couple of days later, and fortunately Charity kindly remembered the zucchini.What’s more, the very next day I discovered our first zucchini of the season, ripe and ready for picking. Right there in our garden!Suddenly, we were awash in zucchini (cucumber, too, but that’s another post)!So I set my son to work making the zucchini bread. He said he wants to be a great cook, so we decided he should learn to make the things he likes, to share them with his friends.He followed this recipe, underlining where he was and checking off what he’d done:I pulled down some of the ingredients for him, but my son did it all himself…everything except pouring it into the pans.He even handled cleanup, which is important for a beginning cook to learn.And the breads turned out great.He was only interested in learning to make zucchini bread, not the brownies.But I was interested in making Charity’s brownies.The batter looked kind of weird and wormy at this point, with the shredded zucchini mixed into the batter. My picky-eater daughter refused to touch it.For some reason it looked better when spread into the pan.I snapped a picture after it was baked. It’s no thing of beauty, but boy was it moist, rich and fudge-like.We’ll be making these recipes again, not only because we’re about to be inundated with zucchini, but also because they were delicious.Charity’s Zucchini BrowniesFrom Simply in Season

• 1 cup flour
• ¾ cup whole wheat flour
• 1/3 cup baking cocoa
• ½ teaspoon baking soda
• ½ teaspoon salt

Combine in a large bowl.2-3 cups zucchini (shredded)Stir in.

• 1 egg
• ¾ cup sugar
• ¾ cup brown sugar
• ½ cup plain yogurt
• ½ cup oil
• 1 teaspoon vanilla

Combine in separate bowl and beat with fork. Stir into zucchini mixture. Spread evenly into greased 9×13 inch pan.

• ½-1 cup semisweet or mint chocolate chips (Ann’s note: I used semisweet and mixed them in instead of spreading on top)
• ½ cup nuts (chopped; optional)

Sprinkle on top of batter. Bake in preheated oven at 350F until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 35-40 minutes.NOTE: I (Charity) used yellow squash instead of zucchini. I stirred in a whole bag (12 oz) of chocolate chips rather than pouring on top. Also, I had to bake for close to 45 minutes.My Son’s Zucchini Chocolate Chip Bread

• 3 c. flour
• 1/2 c. white sugar
• 1 c. brown sugar
• 1 tsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1 tsp. baking soda
• 1 tsp. cinnamon
• 3 eggs
• 2 c. grated zucchini, unpared
• 3/4 c. oil
• 3 tsp. vanilla
• 1/2 c. chopped walnuts (we left out the nuts)
• 6 oz. chocolate chips

Mix all dry ingredients together; then mix eggs, oil, vanilla and zucchini in a large bowl. Add dry ingredients to wet mixture and mix well. Add nuts and chocolate chips.Grease pans. This batter can be poured into 2 loaf pans or 4 to 5 mini loaf pans, or into muffin pans (about 24). Bake at 350 degrees. Large loaves take about 50 to 60 minutes; mini-loaves about 30 minutes; and muffins about 15 to 20 minutes.

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• Use my stainless steel water bottle. Stainless steel water bottles are often ridiculously expensive, but about a year ago I found some reasonably priced and bought five all at once. So I already own the bottles; we just need to start using them. Except for the plastic bottles that fit in a special holder attached to the frame of our bicycles, I’m going to donate or recycle all of our reusable plastic bottles.
• Look for Fair Trade chocolate. Tracey provides a lot of eye-opening information about the chocolate industry. She convinced me to find a store that carries it—it could be that Target might sell it; I just haven’t looked.
• Goodbye, paper towels. We use sponges, dish towels or rags for most cleanup, but we do usually have a roll of paper towels on hand for occasional spills. Years ago my uncle said that instead of using paper towels, he bought a stack of  “bar mops” for kitchen cleanup. “It’s how they taught us to do it in the Navy,” he explained. So just today I bought two packs of “bar mops.” They look like basic white towels. Then I went to Goodwill and bought a rectangular basket in which to store them. They’re on the counter, ready to swipe up splatters and blobs.
• Environmentally gentle dish-washing detergent. I’m going to pay a little more for Seventh Generation, Mrs. Meyers or Ecos brand detergents that Tracey recommends.
• Compost. We used to faithfully compost kitchen scraps, then I don’t know what happened. I guess I got lazy. I resolved to begin again and pulled out a plastic tub with a tight-fitting lid we can use while collecting peelings and egg shells during meal prep. The kids can run it out to the garden.
• Cloth shopping bags. I hate when I forget these, and it’s always when I’m standing at the checkout with my items rolling along the conveyor belt that I remember them. I will figure out a way to make this a habit.

Things we already do:

• Wash (most of) our clothes in cold water. I started doing this mainly because I was shrinking almost everything! Sometimes I do a load of extra-dirty whites in hot, but cold water has been working fine. And blouses are staying their normal size!
• Hang clothes to dry. This, too, I started because I was shrinking clothes and thought I should avoid the dryer. Plus, I like going outside in the quiet morning to hang them up and love the way they smell when they’re dry.
• Recycle. Apparently we recycle effectively, because our neighbors couldn’t believe our family of six could fit all of our trash into one container. We didn’t tell them that many times, the container isn’t even full.
• Cook from scratch. Because I usually cook from scratch, we use less packaging than if I used mixes and prepared foods. I like to think it’s healthier, without all those additives and preservatives.
• Buy organic and local. Whenever possible, I try to buy organic and locally grown foods. Shopping at the farmer’s market in the summer makes it easy. An organic farmer has a stand, and so far his produce hasn’t been much more expensive than the others.
• Bike whenever possible. For nearby errands, we are trying to use our bikes instead of driving the van. We can easily bike to the library, piano lessons, grocery stores, Goodwill, Barnes & Noble, Officemax, several restaurants and many other shopping destinations.
• Shop secondhand. Speaking of shopping (and Goodwill), I think of my Goodwill shopping as recycling. I buy 90 percent of my clothes from Goodwill (the remaining 10 percent represents swimwear, undergarments, socks, and a few nicer speaking outfits). I also buy books secondhand. And furniture. And cars.
• Glass storage. I’m trying to transition from plastic storage containers to glass. We aren’t totally there, but we’re moving in that direction.
• Travel mug. For tea or coffee, we are trying to use travel mugs. We usually make our beverage at home, but we’re also trying to grab the mugs if we’re off to church and will fill them there instead of using Styrofoam cups.
• Minimal A/C. I prefer relying on open windows and fans in the summer, but my husband does like to bring down the humidity with air conditioning sometimes. This morning, however, I came downstairs and he had opened all the windows to enjoy the morning breeze.
• Garden. We have a vegetable garden again this year. I’ve never been an amazing gardener, but I keep trying, year after year. We usually get a fair amount of tomatoes, zucchini and cucumbers, and it is so rewarding to pick stuff for dinner from my own garden plot.
• Consolidate errands. Whether I’m in my minivan or on my bicycle, I try my best to minimize errands, doing as much as possible in a given outing.
• Natural cleansers. For cleaning, we use really basic, natural products.

We do a lot of “green” things that are so normal to me, it doesn’t occur to me to identify it—I’m sure I could add lots of things on the list that we’ve been doing for years. It’s kind of fun to think about what’s become normal for us, or habit, and what we could do to change even more.Be sure to drop by the book giveaway post and read Tracey’s thoughts on “Slowing Green.”

It’s easy to subscribe to annkroeker.com updates via email or RSS feed.Visit NotSoFastBook.com to learn more about Ann’s book.

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It’s easy to subscribe to annkroeker.com updates via email or RSS feed.Visit NotSoFastBook.com to learn more about Ann’s book.

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It’s easy to subscribe to annkroeker.com updates via email or RSS feed.Visit NotSoFastBook.com to learn more about Ann’s book.

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I was talking with a friend of mine about how people relate—or don’t relate—in our world today.

I’m friends with little 82-year-old Miss Jessie Parker, who came from the deep southern parts of Georgia, complete with a southern-fried accent and a heart of gold. And this woman simply amazed me. She did her own gardening, she still drove, she became very computer savvy…We would have many, many conversations in the middle of the day, in the middle of the yard, sometimes on the back porch and on occasion, over a nice little café for lunch … I learned a lot from talking with Miss Jessie Parker… she taught me that the early years of her life were very, very simple and uncomplicated. And she was completely fine with that simple way of life. She didn’t ask anybody to come along and add all this technology and all this crazy business of trying to make our lives easier. This easier way of life for us, so it seems, has really kind of messed up her world. And she would say things to me like:“Jill, when I was a young mother, we had time to carry the children down to the park in the buggy. We washed their diapers out, sterilized and boiled their glass bottles and somehow still managed to come home and make dinner and have it on the table in time for our husbands when they came home…”Thinking about this simpler life, I said, “Miss Jessie, where do you think it all … where did it all become unraveled for you?” And she didn’t even have to think about it … She knew exactly the answer and she said, “Jill, we used to have land for miles and miles. We didn’t have television and we didn’t have a radio, and so after supper, after the dishes were done, we would go out, and we would visit with the neighbors … for the rest of the evening until the lightning bugs would come out.”And she said the minute these privacy fences went up, we all stopped wanting to get together at night and chat and visit. Suddenly everybody wanted to be by themselves and be alone and be private. She couldn’t understand it.

You’ll note that Miss Jessie did mention the absence of TV and radio opening up time for visiting. But she emphasized the advent of the privacy fence as a turning point. I have to admit that we’ve loved the privacy fence. It keeps our big dog contained. Our kids can play in the yard without wandering off, which mattered a lot when our youngest was little. I can enjoy long quiet times on the back porch uninterrupted. I can examine the garden in my jammies.But I don’t talk as much with our neighbors.Thanks to Miss Jessie Parker, I plan to spend some time sitting on the front porch swing with some sweet tea, more visible and accessible. She’s reminded me how important it is to take a walk with the kids and wave at whoever is out doing yard work, in case they can visit for a few minutes.I can enjoy the privacy, bit it’s more important to have relationships.Yesterday afternoon, we were working inside the privacy fence in the garden, putting in our tomato plants. One of the neighbors walked right in through the gate without hesitating and asked to borrow the extension cord so he could finish trimming his bushes. We gladly loaned him ours, and I was relieved that the privacy fence didn’t hold him back. Maybe our privacy fence isn’t so isolating and private after all?Given that, I think I’ll don a robe before heading out to check the garden tomorrow morning.

“spying on the neighbors” photo by cjc4454, available from Flickr through a Creative Commons license.

The post People and Privacy appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

1. Hosting: We’re hosting out-of-country guests for several days–my in-laws from Belgium are here! What a privilege to spend time with them, catching up after a long separation (we only see them every few years).
2. 31 Days Project: Several of my friends at HighCallingBlogs.com (HCB) are participating in a 31 Day to Build a Better Blog project. With guests in town during much of the month, I knew I could never keep up. But one of the assignments was the create a list post, so this is mine. I created a list post over at NotSoFastBook.com, as well. Today’s assignment is to join a forum and participate. HCB serves as my forum.
3. End of School Year: Like many of us, I’m wrapping up the 2009-2010 school year. Wrap-up includes work with our homeschool co-op where I facilitate an American Literature class as well as our work at home. In fact, as soon as I publish this post, I’m grading a stack of papers. In addition, invitations to open houses and graduations are rolling in. May is maxed out.
4. Mini Marathon: I mentioned on Twitter here and here and Facebook that our family (except The Boy) finished the Indy 500 Mini Marathon, the nation’s largest half-marathon. The two older girls walked it; the Belgian Wonder and I “wogged” it with our youngest daughter.
5. Ann Kroeker Facebook page: I set up an Ann Kroeker Facebook page (which is unfortunately known as a “fan” page … please don’t think I’m picturing myself as a celebrity with fans!). It’s just a place where anyone can visit me on Facebook. Feel free to pop by and “like” the page. If you do so, updates I post there will show up in your news feed. You don’ t have to friend me on Facebook to follow my updates. Also, you can post your own links and such right on the Ann Kroeker page, so if you have a “slow-down solution” you’ve found, for example, or if you write a relevant blog post, post it there; the Ann Kroeker page can be a place where we connect on that Not So Fast topic, as well other ideas and themes. I’m just starting to tap into its potential and look forward to developing it when I get through May and enter the freer summer months.
6. To Kill a Mockingbird: The last book of the school year that we’re reading for the co-op is To Kill a Mockingbird. Re-reading it for the fourth time with the students, I find myself reading a chapter, slapping the book shut with satisfaction, and shouting “I love this book!” to anyone who happens to be in the vicinity.
7. Teen Driver: My eldest daughter has been driving on her permit for some time, but this Wednesday she takes her official driving test. The following Tuesday she can take her written test. After that, if all goes well, she gets her operator’s license. Don’t be frightened; she’s a pretty good driver.
8. Camera: I was given the gift of a nice new camera at Christmas—a splurge gift that the Belgian Wonder and I have been discussing for years (but never acted on … until now). I don’t have aspirations of gradually upgrading equipment to professional quality; I’m not even a gifted amateur. But even as an average, everyday photographer, I have really loved learning new things as I happily click away. Photoplay tips from the HCB photo editor Claire Burge have inspired, as well. The results motivate me to try new things and shoot even more snapshots of our daily lives. So I just want to publicly thank my husband and the whole family for blessing me, and I hope my experiments bless the six of us with pleasing visual records of this era of our lives. Ironically, I’m not including a photo of the camera; I tried to take one in the mirror, but it didn’t turn out quite right.
9. Speaking: I spoke at St. Mark’s Methodist Church in Carmel, Indiana, a couple of weeks ago. On the weekend of May 22-23, I’ll be interviewed at Grace Community Church in Noblesville, Indiana, on the topic of families slowing down and simplifying enough to nurture a more contemplative life, seeking and submitting to Christ together.
10. “How can I help?”: My father-in-law grew up in what was then the Belgian Congo (now Democratic Republic of Congo, or DRC). We’re looking forward to hearing stories and seeing pictures from a recent trip to DRC. In his travels throughout the cities of Kinshasa, Kikwit, and out into the rural areas of the Bandundu province, he asked the people, “How can we help?” We will get to hear what the people said when my father-in-law posed the question and listened; we will learn how we can help.

I wonder what the world could be like if we all asked that question and listened carefully to the response? How can we help? We could ask it country to country, church to church, neighbor to neighbor, child to parent—anyone to anyone: “How can I help?” Can we try it today, with someone we love? Can we ask with open minds and hearts … and truly listen?

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In A Circle of Quiet, Madeleine L’Engle wrote:

During the long drag of years before our youngest child went to school, my love for my family and my need to write were in acute conflict. The problem was really that I put two things first. My husband and children came first. So did my writing. Bump.

The conflict—or collision—of work and family summed up in a word:  Bump.Ouch.

• How do you handle the collision of work and family?

• How have demanding seasons of work affected your family life?

• Is your current pace “sustainable”?

• What changes have you already made—or what changes could you make—to create a more sustainable life? Have you “trimmed your day,” for example, and simplified?

“Remember, there is no Bump” photo by Ethan Lofton available through Flickr under a Creative Commons license.

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Here at the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome—it doesn’t have to be a recipe. If you just want to post photos of your knife sharpener, that’ll do just fine.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (the big one above or smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post and join us through Mr. Linky.Here’s a Mr. Linky tutorial:

Write up a post, publish, then return here and click on Mr. Linky below. A screen will pop up where you can type in your blog name and paste in the url to your own Food on Fridays post (give us the exact link to your Food on Fridays page, not just the link to your blog).You can also visit other people’s posts by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking participants’ names–you should be taken straight to their posts.Please note: I return when possible during the day and update this post by hand to include a list of the links provided via Mr. Linky. If I can’t get to the computer to do so, you can access them all by clicking on the Mister Linky logo.

Food on Fridays with Participants

Food on Fridays with Ann

The other day, we ran out of store-bought bread. Instead of running out for a plastic-wrapped loaf from Kroger, I decided to make some whole wheat bread at home. I tried one of the first recipes that came up with the search terms “whole wheat bread recipe moist soft”: Whole Wheat Honey Bread We tried it and loved it. It really is moist and soft, just like I hoped for when I typed in those search terms. We ate the whole loaf in record time.Next day, I made another loaf that turned out as fabulous as the first. Set a new consumption speed record with that loaf.The day after that, I made a third loaf that was just as good as the first two, quickly snapping a photo before it, too, was gobbled up.I’ve never had great luck with bread. Until now.This is officially our bread.I altered the recipe ever-so-slightly, so click on the hyperlink to see the original. My tweaks are indicated below.Everyday Whole Wheat Honey Bread

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Photo © 2010 by Zoe Sandvig of A Sideways Glance. Used with permission.

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Progress Report #3Mega Memory Month January 2010 is over halfway through. Are you halfway through your project?Leave a note on your progress at the Facebook Event page I set up for Mega Memory Month (write your comments on the wall!) HERE. You can also summarize your progress in the comments of this post and/or link your own Progress Report post here via Mr. Linky.

Mr. Linky instructions:Click on the icon and a separate screen pops up. In one box, you type in your name and/or website; in the other box, paste in the url to your post. It’ll be saved and accessible by returning to this page and clicking on the icon again.I’ll return later in the day and embed the pop-up links into the text itself here for easy access.

Ann’s ProgressI’m behind. Dreadfully behind.The idea was to work on one verse per day. This would work if I’d keep up. But I haven’t.What’s motivating, though, is that as I catch up, I’ll be working on a powerful section that describes Jesus as “the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation.” I especially want to know this part by heart.This section reminds me that “by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together” (verses 16-17).All things were created by Him and for Him.He is before all things.In Him, all things hold together.That’s big.I want to have those words inside of my head, inside my heart…So, to try to catch up, I decided to pull out every memorization tip and technique. For example, I realized I pick up things well through listening, so I decided to hunt down an audio recording of Colossians 1 (NIV). I found it. Who wouldn’t want to hear Colossians 1 read to them by Max McLean (complete with a smooth British accent)? To listen, click HERE. And thanks, Bible Gateway.Search for an audio recording of your own passage and translation at Bible Gateway HERE. (They offer Contemporary English Version, ESV, NIV, Today’s NIV, NASB and KJV).

He is before all things, and in him all things hold together (Colossians 1:17)

Lord, hold these words together in my head.

For your convenience, I decided to keep these memorization resources right at your fingertips each week:• Click HERE to read “An Approach to Extended Memorization” by Dr. Andrew Davis, an article highly recommended by Amy at Lavender Sparkles.• Click HERE for my mega collection of memorization tips and techniques.• Click HERE for more inspiration and practical suggestions for memorizing Scripture from Ann Voskamp of Holy Experience.

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One morning I spied my son sitting on one of the kitchen chairs, his toes easily touching the floor. I stopped and stared. Something about his posture and those long, lean legs … for a moment, backlit by the morning sun, my eight-year-old boy looked like a teenager.Now, I was a little groggy, which may have added to the effect, but the thought of him that much older made my heart gasp.I didn’t mention it to him at the time. I just moseyed across the room to make my pot of tea. But later in the day, while visiting the library, we stepped into the elevator and I told him.“This morning when I saw you sitting at the kitchen table, I thought, ‘Wow, he looks like a teenager.’”He laughed.I continued, “I feel like I’m just going to *blink* and you’ll be all grown up.” I squeezed my eyes shut and popped them open wide for dramatic effect.He giggled. Goofy mom…

Today at HighCallingBlogs (HCB) I wrote about how quickly the kids seem to grow and how little we can do to stop it.But I found some writers in the HCB network who seem to know how to slow down and take it all in, experience life through all senses, and relish each moment. I invite you to slip over to HighCallingBlogs.com and read my story along with excerpts of theirs and then let me (and HCB readers) know your secret: How do you take in life when it wants to race forward in a *blink*?How do you relish each moment?In the midst of a life that refuses to slow down, how do you slow yourself?I told my kids about my story, describing how I feel that in a  *blink*, they’re all grown up. Their advice?“Don’t blink!”Read “It Happens in a Blink” HERE.

“Long legs” photo © 2010 by Ann Kroeker.

Mega Memory Month January 2010 has returned!

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LL: I remember meeting you at the Calvin festival. I was walking through the breezeway, and from a distance, I saw this cool looking person peering at me inquisitively. It was you! We officially met moments later, then spent a lunchtime together chatting forever. Remember?Ann: How could I forget how gracious you were after I practically stalked you! I knew you through blogging communities and writing networks online, but we’d never officially interacted. So when I saw your book, Stone Crossings, for sale at the InterVarsity Press table at the Calvin festival, I asked the staff if you were attending. They said you were, and I thought, “Hey, here’s a chance to meet that smart LL Barkat.” Yes, I really thought that, because I admired your clever, intelligent comments and your beautiful yet accessible poetry.I asked what you looked like, since I’d never seen a photo of you. They described you, so I spent the rest of the day looking for someone who fit that description. When I spotted you down that breezeway, you looked like a promising candidate. I was staring at you, waiting until you got close enough so that I could read your name tag. You must have been thinking, “Am I about to be accosted?”Instead of running or calling security, you were poised and gracious; and when I explained myself, you invited me to join you for lunch! We packed a lot into that lunch break. I think we talked about books we were reading, books we were writing, publishing, agents, bloggers and blogging. And shoes. We discussed our shoes…

Speaking of shoes, here they are:

I’d love to share this interview with you in its entirety. Would you mind popping over to L.L.’s Green Inventions blog to read it?

Click HERE.

Photo of L.L. Barkat’s and my shoes by L.L. Barkat. Used with permission.

Mega Memory Month January 2010 has returned!

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Progress Report #1We’re only four days into Mega Memory Month January 2010, so progress will be minimal. Still, you may have something to say about it.If so, leave a note in the comments and/or link your own Progress Report post here via MckLinky. I’ll come back later in the day and embed the pop-up links into the text itself for easy access.

Powered by MckLinky

Click here to enter your link and view the entire list of entered links…

1. Erin at filling my patch of sky
2. Amy @ Lavender *Sparkles*
3. Stand and Consider

Ann’s Progress Report:Colossians 1 has 29 verses.January has 31 days.That equates to about one verse per day. If I stay on track, I’ll get two extra days to review the whole thing at the end of the month; if I get behind, I have a couple of make-up days for the verses I’m lacking.Perfect.I’m starting out with Dr. Andrew Davis’s method as recommended by Amy at Lavender *Sparkles* (Amy summarizes the method in this post.)• Click HERE to read “An Approach to Extended Memorization” by Dr. Andrew Davis, an article highly recommended by Amy at Lavender Sparkles.• Click HERE for my mega collection of memorization tips and techniques.• Click HERE for more inspiration and practical suggestions for memorizing Scripture from Ann Voskamp of Holy Experience.

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For Mega Memory Month January 2010, I’ll be working on Colossians 1.The thought is (I admit this may be a bit idealistic—even unrealistic—nevertheless…) that I might add on to this chapter over time; that is, for future Mega Memory Months I could continue with Colossians 2, 3 and 4.For now, I’m going to focus on Colossians 1 without fretting about the rest. Colossians 1 has 29 verses, so that’s approximately one verse per day. Now, I know that’s a lot for my feeble mind to tackle, but surely it can be done.After all, “all things were created by him and for him” (Colossians 1:16). My mind, including its aging synapses, was created by Him and for Him. To use it for this purpose—to concentrate on memorizing a chunk of God’s written Word—seems right and good. There will be much to ponder and celebrate along the way. For example, this passage includes a long prayer, so that my memory work can take on dual purpose and meaning, breathing life into my own prayers:

For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. (Colossians 1:9-14)

Toward the end of the month, if I make it through the entire chapter, I’ll arrive at this verse:To [the saints] God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory (Colossians 1:27).

Christ in you.

I’ll cling to that this month, as I struggle through the paragraphs and stumble over phrases. It’s not just about the words in me … it’s about The Word in me.Christ in me.Now that right there puts the “mega” in this month.

Dove ornament photo © 2009 by Ann Kroeker.

To participate in Mega Memory Month, visit its Headquarters post HERE.

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Mega Memory Month Returns January 2010!

Our extended family’s white elephant exchange included some bags stuffed full of odd items picked up at a dollar store, included this minibook:Can you believe it?Just in time for Mega Memory Month January 2010 I secured a copy of Improving Your Memory for Dummies, by John B. Arden, PhD, Director of Training for Psychology, Kaiser Permanente Medical Centers.Here’s an excerpt to get us thinking about memory work from the heading:

Feeding your brain properlyYour ability to remember depends on a number of factors, first of which is maintaining a healthy brain through adequate nourishment. To ensure that your brain works at an optimum level, follow these guidelines:

• Maintain a balanced diet. What you eat affects your brain’s chemistry. Eating the right foods at the right time gives your body the building blocks to manufacture brain chemicals called neurotransmitters. Neurotransmitters not only affect your mood and ability to think clearly, but also your ability to remember. A simple, balanced meal consists of a carbohydrate, a protein, and a fruit or vegetable. Eating a balanced meal three times a day can provide you with a sound foundation for your brain and its memory.
• Take the right supplements. Vitamins and herbs can support your brain’s ability to produce good memory skills. Specific vitamins, such as some of the B vitamins, help form the building blocks for healthy brain chemistry. Other vitamins, such as vitamin E, help your brain cleanse itself of bad chemicals. Herbs such as ginkgo, have been used to enhance the circulation of blood in the brain.
• Get regular exercise. Exercise enhances your memory because it helps your brain get the nutrients that it needs. Every time you exercise, you increase your respiratory rate, your metabolism, and your energy level.

Avoiding foods, drinks, and drugs that depress memoryFoods, drinks, and chemicals that your brain is exposed to have major effects on your memory.Warning: If you eat junk food loaded with sugar, you set yourself up to crash, finding yourself full of anxiety and short of short-term memory. Similarly, if you drink too much caffeine, the liquid anxiety scatters your thoughts and shatters your memory ability. If you consume caffeine and sugar on an empty stomach, your mood and memory skills will plummet quickly. (Arden 13-14)

In summary, it appears that as we work toward memorizing something meaningful … something mega, we can support (or avoid impeding) our efforts by eating a balanced diet, taking the right supplements (he didn’t provide much guidance on that topic), and exercising.Will you join me in January?Memorizing something is a mega-powerful way to start out the new year. You can work on almost anything and reap benefits—I’ve enjoyed including poetry in my Mega Memory Month selections during previous MMM challenges, for example—but this time my focus is exclusively Scripture. I want to exercise my mind and feed my soul; for me, memorizing a passage from the Bible is an important thing I can do to make truth readily accessible to ponder and pray.Here’s what I recommend as you prepare:

1. Pray about your selection.
2. Type up and print out the passage you plan to memorize (consider using card stock for durability as you tote it around with you for a month).
3. Devise a plan. Try to come up with an approach to memorizing that you can try out from the start. See the two links below for suggestions. (And according to Dr. Arden’s Dummies advice, be sure to eat right, take supplements and exercise your body!)
4. Join the challenge!

On January 1st, I’ll create a January 2010 Mega Memory Month carnival headquarters.For an entire month, we’ll all work on our passages together and report back each week on our progress (Mondays).At the end of the month, we’ll celebrate together whatever we managed to take in.You won’t be alone.I hope many will join the Mega Memory Month challenge in January, but you will have me along for the ride, at the very least.I’m not an expert at memorizing, but I’ll be working hard.And I’ll do my best to encourage you along the way.• Click HERE for my mega collection of memorization tips and techniques.• Visit Holy Experience for more inspiration and practical suggestions for memorizing Scripture.Our minds (and hearts!) can hold more than we think they can.

Work Cited: Arden, John B.  Improving Your Memory for Dummies. Indianapolis, IN: Wiley Publishing, Inc., 2009. Print.

Get ready … Mega Memory Month returns January 2010!

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(alternative button below)

Here at the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome. Recipes are enjoyed, but you can describe your Christmas menu. I actually would be interested to know what you have for breakfast and the main meal.Anyway, my point is that the Food on Fridays parameters are not at all narrow. I think of it as a virtual pitch-in where everyone brings something to share; even if the content of one item is unrelated to the rest, we sample it all anyway and have a great time.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (the big one above or the new smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post and join us through Mr. Linky.Here’s a Mr. Linky tutorial:

Write up a post, publish, then return here and click on Mr. Linky below. A screen will pop up where you can type in your blog name and paste in the url to your own Food on Fridays post (give us the exact link to your Food on Fridays page, not just the link to your blog).You can also visit other people’s posts by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking participants’ names–you should be taken straight to their posts.Please note: I return when possible during the day and update this post by hand to include a list of the links provided via Mr. Linky. If I can’t get to the computer to do so, you may access them all by clicking on the Mister Linky logo.

Food on Fridays with Ann

Next Friday is Christmas Day. If I think of it, I’ll toss up a Christmas greeting with a Mr. Linky for super-motivated foodies, but don’t hold me to it.When I was visiting some of last week’s Food on Fridays participants, I was particularly intrigued by the very first link.Frugal Antics of a Harried Homemaker linked to a recipe for Gingerbread with Lemon Sauce.I’ve never made gingerbread before. The kids have never tasted it.So I decided to give it a try.Yum!Some of the kids weren’t too keen on the lemon sauce, but they’re picky eaters. So we won’t count their votes.Most of us devoured our first serving and helped ourselves to a second.She described this gingerbread as a cake-y, warm, “Old World” version that she found in a 1936 Pennsylvania Dutch cookbook.  The lemon sauce recipe comes from the 1945 American Woman’s Cook Book.Click on THIS LINK for her recipe.Here is a brief pictorial of my first experience making gingerbread.First I was startled by the amount of molasses required. One whole cup used up half the bottle. It smells a little weird, too, so I was glad none of the kids wandered in at this point.

What is molasses, anyway? I wondered this, and in the spirit of lifelong learning, I looked it up. Unlike my industrious son who heaved open the giant Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, I simply clicked on Merriam-Webster online.

What is molasses? Click HERE for dictionary definition. Click HERE for Wikipedia explanation. Click HERE to read about the Boston Molasses Disaster of 1919.

One of the kids came into the kitchen and asked what I was baking.

“Gingerbread,” I answered.

“Oh! Is it gingerbread cookies?”

“No, it’s gingerbread.”

“Can we make it into a gingerbread house?”

“No, it’s just gingerbread. It will be like cake.”

“Oh.”

I repeated that exchange almost verbatim three times with three different kids.

Never made lemon sauce before. I think it turned out right.

Most of my baking takes place at night when there’s no natural light, so these pictures never turn out all that great.

Nevertheless, here it is. A slice of gingerbread with lemon sauce.

I don’t really have a particular holiday treat that everyone waits all year for me to make. I thought this could be the thing. I loved it and would make it again and again.

I suspect that the kids, however, would prefer that I try making the dough for a gingerbread man, instead.

Anyone have a good gingerbread cookie recipe for me to try?

May you enjoy many delicious Christmas memories!

Get ready … Mega Memory Month returns January 2010!

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The post Food on Fridays: Gingerbread with Lemon Sauce appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

Mega Memory Month Returns January 2010!

Imperfect but hopefully charming photos of a lifelong learner exploring the dictionary by Ann Kroeker © 2009

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The post Big Books and Mega Memory: The Stuff of Lifelong Learning appeared first on Ann Kroeker, Writing Coach.

(alternative button below)

Here at the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome. Recipes are enjoyed, but you can simply tell us how many dozen cookies you agreed to donate to the neighborhood cookie exchange or reveal how many bags of flour you have in the pantry for Christmas baking projects.In other words, the Food on Fridays parameters are not at all narrow. I think of it as a virtual pitch-in where everyone brings something to share; even if the content of one item is unrelated to the rest, we sample it all anyway and have a great time.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (the big one above or the new smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post and join us through Mr. Linky.Here’s a Mr. Linky tutorial:

Write up a post, publish, then return here and click on Mr. Linky below. A screen will pop up where you can type in your blog name and paste in the url to your own Food on Fridays post (give us the exact link to your Food on Fridays page, not just the link to your blog).You can also visit other people’s posts by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking participants’ names–you should be taken straight to their posts.Please note: I return when possible during the day and update this post by hand to include a list of the links provided via Mr. Linky. If I can’t get to the computer to do so, you may access them all by clicking on the Mister Linky logo.

Food on Fridays Participants

Food on Fridays with Ann

Some of you may have caught on Twitter (@annkroeker) or Facebook the fondue recipe I used from this site:Extraordinary (and Simple) Chocolate FondueIngredients:16 ounces dark, sweet or semi-sweet chocolate (I used semi-sweet chocolate chips)1 1/2 cups light cream (I used half-and-half)1 tsp. Vanilla extractInstructions:1. Break chocolate squares into smaller pieces and drop them into the fondue pot. (Or just toss in the chocolate chips)2. Add cream (which will prevent the chocolate from going lumpy) and stir gently but constantly until the chocolate is melted and smooth.3. Add vanilla extract and stir.4. Use a fondue fork to spear the fruit, then dip it in the chocolate. Enjoy!We dipped pears, bananas, and apples, and a few sticky old marshmallows we found in the back of the cabinet.I had everything on hand.It was ready in minutes.We ate too much.But it was good.(p.s. It reheats well)Gather some friends and family for a battle-of-the-fondue-recipes night:Try Extraordinary (and Simple) Chocolate Fondue next to…

• Stretch Mark Mama’s Fudgy Chocolate Fondue!
• Do you have a favorite fondue? Leave yours in the comments and I’ll update this list with your recipe link when possible.

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“Nestled Apple” photo by Ann Kroeker (2009).

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The Scarlet Letter was my first book to try to organize existing materials. While there are many outstanding resources, and a trained teacher with years of experience would have much more insight than I, here is what I pulled together:

• Study Guide: For accountability and to check comprehension, I try to find a study guide for each book that the students must fill out as they read. We only meet once a week, so if they can’t figure out what’s important to note in the assigned chapters, they could be lost for days before we clear it up in class discussion. I used this Glencoe study guide that I found online, picking and choosing the activities (they had to complete the questions, but I skipped or modified some of the activities).
• Skit: Based on some feedback I got via e-mail, I got the feeling the students didn’t understand what was happening in “The Custom House” and the first few chapters of the book, so I brought in a construction paper “A,” a fake flower, and a big piece of cardboard. I had the students act out the basics of “The Custom House,” having the Nathaniel Hawthorne/Narrator discover the “A” among the papers. Then we switched to the story itself and someone held the cardboard to be the prison door. Someone else held the flower to be the rose bush. And we talked about the symbolism after they acted it out. I ran around sort of giving instructions and offering a sketchy narration, walking them through the first few events. The book has quite a dramatic opening, but I think its impact and drama can get lost in the difficult vocabulary. For a few minutes, I wanted them to experience the story without sifting through the words.
• Pillory: I found a great photo of a pillory online so they could envision where Hester was standing for her public humiliation. A quick search should turn up examples.
• Journal: The students are required to keep a reading journal, one entry per school day (a minimum of five sentences per entry; yes, I’ve had to count). I check these to be sure they are tracking. They are asked to be responding to their reading in some way—I wanted them to have a safe place to talk freely about the books. I could probably do better at creating some vision for the journals. Some of them don’t seem to grasp the potential of recording their responses and struggle to fill an entry.
• Vocabulary: The study guide provided some vocabulary lists. I used those.
• Quizzes: Most of the quizzes were vocabulary quizzes, since there are so many challenging words in The Scarlet Letter. I had my dictionary next to me the entire time I was reading the book. I should probably try to design them SAT-style, but I haven’t yet; the quizzes have been straightforward, matching the definition to the word.
• Study Resources: I referenced SparkNotes to see what those guides had to say.
• Story Chart: I used a story chart for them to identify key events and people in the book.
• Test: I created the test by modifying the quizzes found at this page. I deleted some questions, changed some of the answers, and added more multiple choice along with some short answer. Some of the questions included the definition of “plot,” “theme,” and “conflict,” which we talked about in class. They also had to answer two short essay questions: (1) “How do guilt, sin and/or shame change Hester, Dimmesdale and Chillingworth?” and (2) “Which character in The Scarlet Letter felt the most alienation? Why do you feel this way?” They were expected to cite at least one passage from the book to support their point(s) as well as talk about plot points or turning points in their own words. They had access to their books for the short essay questions, but not for the multiple-choice/short answer portion.
• Essay Writing: To help the students learn the basics of character analysis, I referenced this and for comparison/contrast essays and sent them to this simple sample essay was annotated to show what worked well. And I really liked this mind map as a tool to help them organize their thoughts and ideas before writing their essay. I took some time one week to walk them through it, though I don’t know if they still reference it.
• Essay Format: To help them learn MLA format, I’ve sent them to the OWL at Purdue.
• Essay Grading: I’ve been using the 6+1 Traits rubric for grading the writing. I like this summary, because it gives me a quick reference while grading that I can also share with the kids, so they can see what I’m looking for.
• Final Project: For their final project, I pulled ideas from Cliff’s Notes. They could choose from the following:

Final Projects

1. Rewrite the forest scene using modern language. (No one chose this.)

2. Write a short story about how the story would be different if Chillingworth’s ship had actually wrecked and he’d never come ashore. (One student wrote a new ending, sort of combining choices 2 and 3, and the result was a charming and much, much happier conclusion for the main characters.)

3. Write a description of Pearl’s future after the novel ends. Does she marry? Have a family? What is her life like? Be sure your choices are consistent with what you know about Pearl and the events at the end of the novel. (One student chose to do this, creatively working in facts from the original story to present a fascinating and detailed summary of Pearl’s future.)

4. Draw a picture or create a collage that shows the relationships among the characters in the story and explain your thinking to the class verbally the week they are turned in and/or on paper. (Most chose this, and the results were outstanding; I couldn’t believe the quality of artwork and fascinating symbolism.)

Read the Book!

You should be able to pick up a copy of The Scarlet Letter at Goodwill and used bookstores, as it is so often assigned in both high school and college—and the students get rid of it when their course is completed. Multiple copies would also be available at the library, along with an abundance of study guides.But you can also read The Scarlet Letter online at many websites. Click around and pick your favorite background, font or navigation from the following sites:

• Page by Page Books
• The Literature Network (posts flashing, annoying ads at the top)
• The Literature Page
• Bartleby (searchable text)
• Project Gutenberg

Enjoy!

If you can use any of these ideas for personal study or with your own family to enrich your reading of this classic of American literature, let me know what you found useful.

Share!

If you find additional resources, I’d love to update and expand this post to include more ideas that deepened a reader’s comprehension and appreciation of The Scarlet Letter.

Stack of books photo by Ann Kroeker. Page from The Scarlet Letter by Ted Cabanes accessed from stock.xchng.

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(alternative button below)

Here at the Food on Fridays carnival, any post remotely related to food is welcome. Recipes are enjoyed, but you can simply tell us your favorite post-flu nourishment. You could share with readers the comfort food you crave when you’ve been under-the-weather or out-and-out ill.In other words, the Food on Fridays parameters are not at all narrow. I think of it as a virtual pitch-in where everyone brings something to share; even if the content of one item is unrelated to the rest, we sample it all anyway and have a great time.When your Food on Fridays contribution is ready, just grab the broccoli button (the big one above or the new smaller option at the bottom) to paste at the top of your post and join us through Mr. Linky.Here’s a Mr. Linky tutorial:

Write up a post, publish, then return here and click on Mr. Linky below. A screen will pop up where you can type in your blog name and paste in the url to your own Food on Fridays post (give us the exact link to your Food on Fridays page, not just the link to your blog).You can also visit other people’s posts by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking participants’ names–you should be taken straight to their posts.Please note: I return when possible during the day and update this post by hand to include a list of the links provided via Mr. Linky. If I can’t get to the computer to do so, you may access them all by clicking on the Mister Linky logo.

Food on Fridays Participants

Food on Fridays with Ann

I’ve had the flu. At first, I didn’t want much to eat at all. Then I had a piece of toast. Then I wanted grapefruit. Then I wanted soup. Chicken noodle soup. So I made some when I was able to get out of bed.

Today I’ve been getting better, but still want something warm to eat. I decided some kind of potato soup or chowder would be the ticket.

So with no solid plan or recipe, I started pulling out stuff that sounded like it would taste good together. All I knew for sure was that potatoes would be involved.

I’m calling this:

Crazy-Flu-Lady Potato Soup

I peeled and cubed some potatoes, then decided to add some sweet potatoes, too, for extra flavor and color.

Tossed in a chicken bouillon cube.

Fried some bacon in a skillet. I took a photo, but it’s out of focus and bacon is really kind of gross to look at up close, so I leave that to your imagination.

Realized that some onion would probably be good, but I can’t eat very much onion or my stomach gets upset. So I minced a teeny, tiny bit of onion, fried it in the hot bacon grease, fished it out and tossed it into the soup pan.

When the potatoes were soft, I pulled some out and mashed them in another bowl with a potato masher gadget.

Then I put the mashed potatoes back in to thicken the soup. No need for cornstarch or flour to thicken when I do it this way.

Added some fat-free half-and-half I had in the fridge, randomly pouring some in until it looked good.

Tossed in some frozen corn I found in the freezer.

Added the crumbled bacon.

Salt. Pepper. More salt. More pepper.

That’ll do.

When I’ve been sick—especially if my throat has been sore—I crave warm soup. And I’ll get some idea to toss a bunch of stuff together without a real plan and eat two bowls of whatever comes out at the end of 20 minutes or so.

That’s what crazy-flu-lady is doing, now that she’s out of bed.

But this isn’t just crazy-flu food. You could easily serve this and a couple more soups along with some good bread and a salad for a dinner with friends.

Invite some people over for the evening, as I recommend over at NotSoFastBook.com, and enjoy some conversation along with your soup.

And maybe even some community.

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We were going to be late.But I couldn’t help myself.  I paused what I was doing and joined him in front of the window. And there it was, my full faced moon-friend, hanging low in the misty dark of the pre-dawn. I moved behind my boy and wrapped my arms around his ever-growing body.And. We. Just. Looked.

Just taking a moment here and there—pausing to look at the moon, sitting for a moment of quiet, turning off the television for one half-hour—we can take baby steps toward living a slower life.We can begin to listen.We can go from the rush, to a hush.The children’s book Goodnight Moon is a favorite with children. I think it’s because after full, rushed days, the simple process of saying “goodnight” to each item in the room is a child’s way of slowing. It’s an antidote to the sped-up, frenzied day the family may have endured.Goodnight moon.Goodnight cow jumping over the moon.The day is coming to a close. I think I’ll sip a little cocoa.Goodnight light and the red balloon.Turn off the computer. Look over my planner. Scribble another to-do list item. Write a thank-you note.Goodnight clocks and goodnight socks.Pull out a journal. Pen. Bible. My Utmost for His Highest. Set them on the table next to my bed. Before settling in with my books and writing, however, I prepare to tuck in the children.Goodnight little house and goodnight mouse.Room by room, I will kiss children and pray. Then I’ll climb into my own bed.Goodnight stars, goodnight airA page in My Utmost for His Highest.It says, “If I want to know the universal sovereignty of Christ, I must know Him for myself, and how to get alone with him; I must take time to worship the Being Whose Name I bear. ‘Come unto Me’—that is the place to meet Jesus.”Goodnight noises everywhere. I must know Him for myself, and how to get alone with him.And it occurs to me, as the day winds down, that I might actually be the old lady whispering “hush.”Find silence; be still.”‘Come unto Me’—that is the place to meet Jesus.”Each of us must know Him for ourselves … and how to get alone with him.Shhhh …

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I don’t want to lose that skill, that gift.Or if I have temporarily lost it because I have instead trained my eye on the time or the speedometer or the packed pages of my daily planner, I want to regain it.In spite of having physical eyes that function quite well, I am sometimes guilty of missing a lot—so much that I might as well be blind. I want to see both physical beauty and that which is beyond it; I want a glimpse of deeper realities. Though I’m blessed to have my physical eyesight, I long for more.Wouldn’t it be something to have the privilege given to Elisha’s servant, when Elisha prayed “O LORD, open his eyes so he may see” the reality of hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around to fight on their side? (2 Kings)But even if I never see chariots of fire, I don’t want to squander my everyday sight. I don’t want to blunder through my days like a blind woman.On busy, blurry days, I can feel like the blind man whose story is told in Luke 18. He called out to Jesus, “have mercy on me!”Jesus came near and asked, “What do you want me to do for you?””Lord,” he answered, “I want to see.” Lord, have mercy on me … I want to see. Yes. I, too, want to see! I don’t want to miss the good stuff, the real stuff, the hard stuff, the beauty, the life, the needs, the truth. I want to see all that I need to see.Jesus granted the blind man his sight.I pray He’ll grant sight to these eyes, as well; I turn to Him that I might have eyes that see.And as I start to look around, I’ll start small.Pausing, I’ll give something my full attention.A butterfly.A seed pod.A metaphor.A turn of phrase in the last line of a poem.A friend on the phone.A sculpture.A blob of oil paint on canvas.A daughter walking hand-in-hand with me to the park.A sunflower bobbing over the fence.I don’t mean to simplify something subtle and spiritual by being overly practical, but when I launched a series at NotSoFastBook.com about how to practice “seeing,” I offered art as an entree.It’s a little lesson in seeing.Seeing is much more than learning to appreciate shadow, shape, and color on canvas.But it can slow us down and remind us that there is much more than meets the eye.

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I was interviewed by phone about Not So Fast on a station in Minneapolis, MN, for the “Live! with Jeff & Lee” show.(Wait, let’s pause for a second to count how many prepositional phrases I packed into that first sentence. What’s your count? I think it’s six if you count the one that squeezes in with the name of the show. And the sentence isn’t even that long. Okay, well, I’m leaving it that way. Moving on…)It’s hard to know what to cover during these interactions. The book tackles a wide range of topics, but we only have time to talk about a few things on the air.If you’re curious, you can listen to the MP3 archive HERE.

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This week, I’m told, is “Simplify Your Life Week.”We could talk about how to declutter, how to eliminate two or three things from our schedules, or how to streamline the laundry room.But I think simplifying my life in a way that profoundly impacts my daily experience must begin at a deeper level….Read the entire post over at NotSoFastBook.com.

Don’t miss a word:Subscribe to annkroeker.com updates via email or RSS feed.Learn about Not So Fast: Slow-Down Solutions for Frenzied Families

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